i thought it's gonna be easy. i was wrong.

i think of this as a test of some sort.

i sure still have episodes when i don't think i can remain firm on my decisions, when i find it tempting to reach out, kiss and make up. i still sometimes succumb to my emotions. but i'm doing well. i know i am. i was.

i have a good back-up. i have the best support group in the world. i have friends who remind me of what i want when i get confused. i have a sister who became unusually sweeter and gentler.

then i got a call. and i'm back to zero.