have you discovered something that initially shocked your whole being recently? did you just get some news that somehow stole your senses? anything at all that, for a while, disrupted your smooth-going system?
i did.
two days ago, i got that "shock" of my life. (i know it doesn't seriously qualify as one, but i'll just use the word anyway for lack of a better term.) it's about losing, for real and possibly for good, the only love i know in my entire 23 years of existence. it's pretty petty, but i say it was, or has been, heartbreaking. and i know it was selfish of me to feel that way. still, i got an immediate empty cold numb feeling that right there and then i wanted to lock myself up in the bathroom and maybe shed a few tears. i tried, but failed. and so i went back to my station and back to work, a bit depressed and half-okay but still able to function.
jac and tets ruined my peace, "harassed" me and forced me to take my break along with them as i was writing this. so i lost my line of thoughts (or line of thinking according to grammatically-correct tets nones. haha). anyway, going back...
two days ago. and i can honestly say that i'm a whole lot better now than how i was when i first caught (and by caught i mean proactively sourced) that "information." i'm back to my normal-functioning-thinking self with even higher spirits. apparently, i cope up quickly, or should i say i willed myself to cope fast.
now, just a few hours ago, one dear friend of mine, shared something "shocking" to me too--her own share of "shock," of a completely different type. she too, is having her usual day at work-- chill, normal, smooth-sailing--until she received that message that sent her "shocks." right away, she's down and upset. although, i know, mature as we are, we all can say "mind over matter" and we can try to brush the thought off and out of our system and go back to work and act professionally (the not-letting-your-personal-issues-affect-your-work thing), sometimes it just doesn't work. she needed time to let the hurt out, and to collect herself afterwards before she can start working again. she needed some time to feel her feelings, to let the anger out, to cry, to "grieve" and take a breather. i feel for her. i know the feeling. and i know how hard it is to try acting okay and try to be fine. although i was able to manage my emotions when i was in that kind of situation, i didn't advise her to do the same.
on that note, i was reminded of the article i read somewhere, sometime ago about a proposed "heartbreak leave," or something like that, for employees/office workers. (sheeesh. i know sometime, somewhere and something like that are all insignificant. bear with me, i really have this habit of not taking mental-note of the details).
anyway, my point is whoever coined that idea is a genius. it’s wise to have that, than getting a “fake” sick leave. i say, it's even more important than maternity leave or any other official leave, if not as important. i mean, not everyone gets to be pregnant, but everyone gets to be depressed, right? i vouch for it not because i need it most (yeah selfish as i can become, i don't have myself in mind), but because people (all types, all genders) experience an inevitable heartbreaking "shock." life, as we know it, has its crazy turns and bumps that would catch us off-guard and once in a while, may give our world a gentle shake and cold feet. and i'm not only talking about love-life heartbreak here, like the one i had. it could be about anything, any trial that one may feel larger than life, too big to handle and too heavy for our heart to carry, even if it may seem otherwise to someone else uninvolved. it's a much-needed break that one should take a time off to collect herself/himself, redeem her/his senses and back to the chill, normal, smooth-sailing life. and after the heartbreak leave, one can go back to work recharged, refocused and refreshed.
